Wednesday, 15 December 2010

Employment Law nightmare for First Century HR Officer!

As revealed earlier this week, previously ignored fragments of the Dead Sea Scrolls have been found to contain the diary entries of Malachi Barnabas, a 1st Century HR Officer working in the Bethlehem area of Israel.

World Exclusive! The Secret Diary of a First Century HR Officer.

Today, HR Case Studies publishes the third extract from his diaries.
My stars! I've no idea what's going on in Bethlehem this week, but it's causing more that its fair share of HR problems.

I went looking for the shepherds - sorry, Nocturnal Pasture Operatives - who had headed down from the hills to gatecrash some sort of party in the stable round the back of The Emperor's Arms. (Something unusual going on there too, I can tell you. All sorts of odd types wandering in and out. Quite a few dressed up in foreign garb and wearing tea-towels on their heads which makes them look pretty amusing!)

But enough of them. The pub landlord of the Emperor's Arms is a friend of mine, and he wanted a bit of advice. Seems that his boss wants to take him through disciplinary procedure for poor performance. Apparently his boss is blaming him for overbooking the hotel during the exercise to get everyone onto Caesar's Holy Roman Information System (HRIS). But he didn't know that it was also the annual Central Israel Pharisees Department (CIPD) conference at the same time. He reckons his boss made that booking, but didn't let him know about it.

The thing is, I'm not sure which country's employment legislation applies to my mate Benjamin. The Emperor's Arms is actually part of an Israeli chain of taverns, but they in turn are actually just a subsidiary of an Egyptian company (Apparently, their flagship hotel near the pyramids is meant to be superb: it's even got beds in the executive suites!) Benjamin himself is on secondment from Assyria, he gets paid in Talents, but that's done through a third party who gives the money to Ben's twin brother in Ephesus, and when he travels here, the company that organise the camel train are based in Ethiopia.

I think I'll have a word with my mate Ephraim Croner who works in the employment section of the Sanhedrin, to see if he's got any light that can be shed on this one. It's always worth checking to see if there's been any parchments sent round on this sort of thing.

Talking of light: I think someone's forgotten to turn the lantern out in the stable round the back of the tavern. Looks like the place is ablaze! Better nip out and see what's going on. I'll have a quiet word about the stable's carbon footprint while I'm at it!
Check out HR Case Studies tomorrow for a further instalment.

1 comment:

  1. Well dear diary, M late home again! Came in muttering something about double bookings and Croner (thought that was an ale, but hey, what do I know).

    Poor Ben, his wife was banking on his bonus. Bet you 3 talents that his boss will receive a nice package though (slippery character that one, deluded too. Reckons his business is serving a divine purpose, I ask you)!

    What a surprise, CIPD at the centre of things again. Fancy having a conference at this time of year. If you ask me they’d be better actually doing something that sitting around looking at their navels. Right shower, couldn’t organise a wine tasting at a wedding!

    Note to self: get M to cancel his subs in the New Year

    Right, off to clean M’s sandals – apparently they have carbon on the bottom.

    Rachael Barnabas