Football: It's a team sort of thing.

Joachim Löw. Germany's hapless manager. At £1.3m per year, makes Capello look like a bargain.

After Germany’s abject 4-0 demolition of Argentina on Saturday evening, questions will inevitably be asked by football pundits everywhere as to why the German team fared so badly.

Questions such as:

• Paid almost £6m, which German national football manager has been heavily criticised for not justifying his salary?
• Which German football player was recently stripped of his captaincy of the national side following revelations concerning his affair with another team player’s ex-girlfriend?
• Following the team’s defeat against Serbia in the group stage, which German player complained that the fans were disloyal for booing, but subsequently felt obliged to issue an apology?
• Other than Michael Ballack (who is not playing anyway!) which German team members compete in the English Premier League (universally recognised as the best league in the world)?
• Which German football player participated in an impromptu press conference hinting that all was not well in the camp, and was later criticised for mutiny?
• Which German player was almost dropped by his national team after allegations of under-age sex with an under-age French prostitute?
• Which German player was sent home from the World Cup after verbally insulting the national coach during the group phase?
• What failure in the German national coaching framework has led to Miroslav Klose already scoring more goals in the 2010 World Cup than he has all season with Bayern Munich?
• Which well-respected England football manager said this weekend, “That was incredible! We really stepped on the gas in the second half and played a liberated style of attacking football. I’ve been proud of my team for a long time, not only today. We played some really great football in the second-half and the team has shown the will of champions. This result and the amount of goals we scored was almost unimaginable before the game." ?