Monday, 16 December 2013

The year ahead in HR: Your month by month guide to 2014


Yes, it's that time of year when the blogosphere is alive with predictions of what is going to happen in the year ahead.

But here, to save you valuable time which otherwise might be wasted in wading your way through the plethora of predictions for the HR profession for 2014, courtesy of the prophetic skills of the HR Case Studies editorial team, are the only predictions that you will need for the year ahead.

Money back if not entirely satisfied!
 
January
While every prediction of what will happen in HR in 2014 fades faster than a festive hangover as soon as the clock strikes midnight on New Year’s Eve, this month also sees the publication of the 2014 "HR Professionals Who Have Been Very Influential and Achieved Far More Than Those Who Appear on Completely Subjective and Unverifiable Lists" list. It is long.
 
February
This month kicks off with the earliest appearance yet of the ubiquitous and perennial “How to Avoid Embarrassment at the Christmas Party” articles in various HR journals and websites.
 
March
A journalist with little or no knowledge of the profession announces its imminent demise. HR professionals work themselves up into a frenzy about the inaccuracy of the article, shortly before realising that no-one else is either reading the article, or in the slightest bit interested anyway.
 
April
There is despair in the UK coaching profession when a scientific study proves conclusively that motivational tweets have no effect whatsoever on personal performance. "Never mind" says Sharon (NLP Master Practitioner, Yoga Black Belt, and author of "Discover Your Inner Lioness") “The answers can be as clear as day, but if you keep looking for dark storm clouds, you will never see the sun of truth”
 
May
Rumours surface of a candidate actually being satisfied with the service received from a recruitment consultancy. Despite a lengthy investigation, ultimately no evidence of the existence of the candidate is found.  
 
June
"The seven secrets of how to achieve mega-stardom by including a number in the title of your book, while at the same time appearing awesome at interview,  redefining your personal brand and achieving fame as a thought leader" becomes the longest title to be listed on Amazon while simultaneously failing to sell a single copy. 
 
July
England crash ignominiously out of the World Cup, provoking cries of “How can this load of muppets justify the amount of money they are paid?” and “Don’t they realise that Alf Ramsey only earned £7,200 per year when he guided England to glory in 1966?”
 
August
A user of LinkedIn claims that it actually helped him find a job. This is later shown to be a marketing gimmick devised by LinkedIn.
 
September
IKEA announces its new Ulrich range of furniture. It features a stool with an interchangeable number of legs.
 
October
A case reaches the European Court of Human Rights in which the plaintiff alleges that they were discriminated against by being the only person in the organisation who couldn’t bring a claim for discrimination on any grounds. They claim that this is a fundamental breach of their human rights.
 
November
During the 2014 CIPD conference in Manchester, police are called to intervene following violence between opposing factions in a debate on the role social media can pay in promoting employee engagement and participation
 
December
The entire HR profession shouts as one, “Please, JUST FOR ONCE, can we have a year that ends without the interminable and meaningless predictions for next year?”

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